Poker News

John Vorhaus

In trying to close the gap between the player I am and the player I want to be, I often find myself bogged down in complicated and conflicting strategic advice. One way out of this mire is to try and reduce complex concepts to trivial one-liners. Here are a few of my favorites:

WHEN YOU GET THE GOODS, BET THE GOODS. Too often, we’re too tricky. Thinking we have a monster, we decide to slow-play, only to discover that we’ve inadvertently let an inferior hand catch up. Conversely, convinced that our table image is bullet-proof, we bluff with vastly inferior cards (betting without the goods) and are shocked and saddened (and impoverished) when someone calls us down. When you get the goods, bet the goods. Do this one thing right, and you’ll be able to beat most of the games most of the time.

BLESSED ARE THE WEAK, FOR THEY SHALL INHERIT THE FLOP. Weak players believe in cheap flops like traveling salesmen believe in cheap suits. They don’t want to raise, and they don’t want you to raise. They don’t want anything interfering with the fun they get out of seeing the flop. Deny them that fun. If you have a hand that warrants a raise, raise. If your opponents will call one bet with a weak hand because they’re in denial about the possibility that anyone behind them might raise… raise! Punish them for their delusion. Not because you hate them just because you want their money.

A SEAT IS ONLY LUCKY AS A FUNCTION OF THE BUTT THAT’S PLANTED IN IT. If your seat is unlucky, it’s your fault! If you’re a bad player, then changing seats will only move the so-called bad luck from where you were to whereyou are. Seat changes are for strategic reasons only. You make a seat change to put yourself in a favorable position against an enemy. Lucky seats… sheesh, that’d be like Napoleon saying, “This fortress is unlucky, I think I’ll go occupy that swamp instead.”

SAVE YOUR EGO FOR THE WINNER’S CIRCLE. Poker should be about cards and chips and winning. When your ego gets involved when your desire to prove your superiority becomes the guiding light of your game you are lost. Save your ego for the winner’s circle. After you’ve proven how good you are, then you get to boast. THEY CAN’T FIGURE OUT YOUR STRATEGY IF YOU DON’T HAVE ONE. I quote this one often, usually just after I’ve done some stupid thing (or seemingly stupid thing) and blundered into a win. I love having my opponents think I’m clueless. It allows them to rationalize all sorts of bad behavior. Which reminds me…

RATIONALIZATION IS THE ACT OF A RATIONAL MAN. Frequently we know the right thing to do, but we look for an excuse not to do it. We know, for example, that it’s senseless to draw to even an open-ended straight against just one other opponent, yet we do it just the same, just to see the look on that smug bastard’s face when we draw out on him. In order to justify our actions, we miscompute pot odds, or tell ourselves that we’re “advertising,” or “keeping “em honest,” or some other foolish, self-deluding nonsense. Always be rational, but never rationalize. And always remember… go big or go home! -jv

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